Wow. That was a dark place I'd not been to in a while. It caught me so off guard. And damnit I *knew* it would be negative because of the bleeding issue. I *knew* I had no hope. Hell, my RE confirmed that I should have no hope. But apparently some crept in when I wasn't even looking because I went into the big-bad-pit-of-despair after testing. As my nephew likes to exclaim when he goes to the dentist, "Not fun, not fun". Well said little man.
But I feel like I'm coming out on the other side of it now. At least somewhat. I had my CD2 appointment, have a plan for this cycle [more on that later], and have manged to crack a smile or two over the last few days.
We spent $2497.00 on infertility related b/s just this month. Now, how often do you go out and spend that kinda money and have nothing to show for it afterward? Seriously, I can't even tell you how badly I need a new pair of jeans. I'm not sure if I even own a pair of socks without holes in them. And don't even talk to me about the situation that is my dog and her hair. I've been cutting her coat for the last year on my own in an attempt to save some money. Let's just say, even she is embarrassed to be seen in public anymore.